I'm with the bandwidth

If you must Wi-fi...

As a freelance writer and editor, I am one of many who cocoon in coffeeshops and Wi-fi hubs to get things done. I won't mention my two favorite sweet spots in this post, but watch out for an upcoming blog at Yummy.ph to find out what they are. (And if you do go to one of them, please don't finish all the Sylvannas.)

While working on a recent Inquirer article ("Where to find the perfect hairstylist," 12/04/09), I ended up typing up some notes on the side involving café decorum. I know I'd already written two blog posts on etiquette, but at the risk of sounding uptight and a buzz-kill to the uplifting benefits of caffeine enjoyed in a communal space, I hope the tips below are indeed worth calling out—for the sake of my co-cocooners and coffeeshop cohorts.


Rule of hours

For every hour you spend lounging and making use of the Wi-fi, try to order at least one item from the menu. I’ve learned the value of turning tables when I worked as a hostess/Maître d' in New York. While neighborhood café staffers don’t rely on this particular system of waiting, it's still ethically sound to not be a freeloader on business space: No matter how cozy or 'homey' the ambience may be, you are still inside a place that relies on revenue to stay in existence.

If however, coffee is already coming out of your ears, leave a tip instead—a generous one.

I noticed in Starbucks the security guard also clears the table after patrons leave. Think of the gratuity as your way of saying 'Thank you' to the guard (who, by job function shouldn't even be busing tables) for doing his job of not letting thieves and thugs who could easily grab your laptop inside the establishment .


Ring, ring, go away

If you are within earshot of at least two people, please step out of the café to use your phone. If you're already wearing a Bluetooth headset, all the easier it is to quietly slip out and continue the (emphatic) conversation outside. I perfectly understand how Wi-Fi hubs can be such convenient workspaces, but note that these places are still first and foremost dining facilities—not your office.


One top, two top

It is indeed very, very tempting to make a beeline for the plush couches or big corner booths upon arriving at your Wi-fi hotspot of choice. But before you whip out the extension cord, look around and gauge traffic inside the establishment. If it looks busy, go for a smaller table that seats two, or to be even more prudent(?), park yourself by the solo bar stools, if available. But if you come in when it's quiet, feel free to stretch out and bounce off the walls. Once it gets busy though, take that as your cue to go offline and be elsewhere—your office, perhaps, or even better: home.